Social work, specifically to teen parents, has opened a brand new part of my heart and mind.
Working with teens alone brings necessary character, care, and personality. Add that these young ones...now raising babies...brings a whole other element!
These last couple of months I've been dealing with an injured foot and being unwell with multiple colds after perhaps the flu. In these moments of dependency on my wonderful & patient husband, along with my fantastic co-workers, I've had times in which I've just had to sit and wait.
This brought on some isolated times. Not able to work downstairs in my office with my co-workers and being stuck in a cold room all by myself. Initially this was my introverted side's dream. But too much time alone isn't good for any of us. And although I struggled, the Lord, in His continuous faithfulness, has seen me through.
This time did give me a new perspective about something which has bothered me for over a decade. There has been this sense of a population of people in which I couldn't quite figure out how to describe. There is a long-suffering deficiency in them...but I just haven't been able to figure out what it is. During my season of silence/isolation I finally have been able to pin point what it is: Vacuous Apathy.
I had experienced apathy before. My heart always aches when we are affected by those who treat others with apathy. In fact I really struggled during my seasons of depression (roughly around 2014-2016) when I would reach out for help and was met with such hurt. I'm still working through the repercussions of those traumatic experiences. Yet what is one step worse is when ignorance is added to the mix. In short the don't know don't care perspective. Do we really understand how damaging this is!?
Vacuous: an adjective, having or showing a lack of thought or intelligence; mindless
Apathy: a noun, lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern (www.dictionary.com)
This new awareness came from seeing parents who haven't yet obtained skills and knowledge regarding life skills and parenting. This alone isn't the problem. What happens is they reach out for help...or they research and are unable to obtain the tools and knowledge they need. That leads to discouragement, depression, and even an overwhelming sense of failure and overload. If there is no support system in place or they are met by apathy...they in turn are susceptible to turning into the same...but without knowledge. They become vacuously apathetic. This then affects how they function. How they interact with others and most dangerously how they care (or don't care) for their children. I'm not even going to get into adding on their past traumas as that opens even larger, long-term damaging affects.As I observed this, I realized this is why it is so hard to love this population. Not just teen parents, but anyone who has fallen into this toxic apathetic sense of living and relating. What breaks my heart, and I dare say the Lord's as well, is how often I have seen this disease in so many of those who identify themselves as Christians/ followers of Jesus Christ.
It is not that I am merely upset that Christians (or those who call themselves Christians) don't have enthusiasm about what the Bible says, or what God is doing. I am intensely sorrowful when I watch this vacuous apathy played out regularly by those who claim to know Jesus.
It is a selfish, lazy, and prideful way of living that has spread among so many of us, myself included. And it brings a dangerous hopelessness in my spirit sometimes. Why have we allowed this into our minds and hearts?!
I have been convicted by the Lord that I cannot love others...especially those who are in this pattern of apathy until I deal with my own sickness that I've allowed in. It is similar to bitterness-which is why I haven't been able to pinpoint it in the past. I am learning through humbling myself before the Lord. Also working through this and other things, with trusted, godly women.
As I was writing this, I started thinking of James chapter two in the Bible. After re-reading it, I found these passages.
James 2: 15-17 (ESV) "If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, "Go in peace, be warmed and filled," without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead."
James 2:20(ESV) "Do you want to be shown, you foolish person, that faith apart from works is useless?"
So even though I'm still working on this myself, I felt I should share these thoughts with others as well. Can I encourage you to take sometime of self-reflection? To be willing to admit if you have these symptoms? And to go to the Lord Jesus for help and healing? May I also challenge you one step further--to change how you treat people and what you say (or post on social media). Perhaps pause more to ask yourself...why am I saying this? Is this going to honor the Lord? Do I care? Do I know? Will you be willing to learn more about what others are going through and hearing their life stories? Will you be open to doing what God has put on your heart individually? This could be just slowing down and looking around to see if anyone just needs a smile or a helping hand. In the grocery store, the pew or hallway at church, or the chair across from you, or the person in the car next to you. I pray in the name of Jesus, that we will flee from this temptation, and that He will protect us, our families, and our community from such simple yet venomous living.
(Picture source: https://me.me/i/whats-the-difference-between-ignorance-and-apathy-dont-know-dont-08465787180744f3957b7ede0b6dea3f)
